Your R-Z of BDSM language.


RPG – Abbreviation for Role Play Games.
Rack – Bondage furniture patterned after the infamous torture device of the Inquisition. The sub is put on it and “stretched” – but not in the extreme fatal way.

Rape fantasy (sometimes referred to as rapeplay) or a ravishment is a sexual fantasy involving imagining or pretending being coerced or coercing another into sexual activity. Studies have found rape fantasy is a common sexual fantasy among both men and women. The fantasy may involve the fantasist as either the one being forced into sex or being the perpetrator. The most frequently cited hypothesis for why women fantasise of being forced and coerced into some sexual activity is that the fantasy avoids societally induced guilt—the woman does not have to admit responsibility for her sexual desires and behaviour, and it is a fantasy themed around being overpowered, dominated, and helpless while fully consenting to this form of activity according to her own rules of how it should be enacted with her play partner(s).

Real Life or Real Time – r/l or r/t – as opposed to virtual or cyber life.
Red – Most common safe word meaning stop.
Restraint – Limiting the sub’s movement with the use of various bondage gear, equipment or devices.
Restriction – Limiting the sub’s behavior or physical movement.
Riding Crop – see Crop.
Rimming – Tongue contact with the rectum or asshole
Ring Gag – A device that keeps the submissive’s mouth wide open. Also called a “piss gag”
Role Play Games – Taking fantasy roles in BDSM scenes. For example, nurse or doctor/patient, etc.
Rope – The most common of bondage equipment.
Rubber – After leather, the most popular fetish material.


SAM – Smart Assed Masochist. A pseudo submissive who attempts to control everything the dominant does.
S&M – Sadism and masochism. One who enjoy administering pain and one who enjoys receiving pain.
S/m – Modern term for S & M. Also SM, S/M, SMer
Sadist – An individual who enjoys causing pain. The term dates back to the Marquis de Sade.
Sadomasochism – The perversion of taking pleasure, especially sexual gratification from simultaneous sadism and masochism.
Safe, Sane and Consensual – A popular slogan in the BDSM world meaning that play should always be safe, with good judgment exercised. And, most importantly, it MUST be consensual.
Safe Word – A word or phrase a submissive can use to stop his or her scene. It is absolute. If a Dominant disregards a submissive’s safe word, that Dominant is considered “unsafe.” The most common safe word is “RED!” Some also use a caution word such as “Yellow” to signify that the dominant is approaching a limit.
Saint Andrew’s Cross – A popular piece of BDSM furniture where a submissive can be conveniently tied or cuffed to it and rendered immobile. It looks like a big cross!
Safe Sex – Using condoms and taking all necessary health precautions during sex.
Saran Wrap – Brand of cling film used in mummification scenes.
Scat – Faecal play. An abbreviation for “scatological.”
Scene – A BDSM session. Can be used to refers to “public scene” at a party where the participants let others watch or a “private scene” where just the Dominant and submissive are present.
Schoolgirl Role-play – Popular RPG wherein the submissive is the “bad school girl” and the Dominant is the “teacher.”
Self-Bondage – The practice of performing bondage on oneself by oneself.
Shackle – Metal or leather bondage restraint device consisting of round cuffs joined by a chain or bar.
Shaving – It is very common in BDSM for submissives to shave their pubic hair.
Shoe Fetish – One who enjoys shoes. Popular fetish, even in the vanilla world.
Slapper – Rigged paddle modified to make a loud sound. 
Slave – A term used interchangeably with “submissive.” Some consider a slave a more extreme version of a submissive.
Slave Contract – A signed consensual contract, wherein a submissive or slave cedes to the Dom or Master a specified set of powers over her for a set period of time. Although legally unenforceable, it is still a powerful document between dominant and slave

Snert - A term referring to a  snot nosed, egotistical rude twit, usually spoken, though it may be written, to make an acquaintance laugh in an inappropriate situation; the term is often spoken as the speaker looks slightly downward and generally to the left or right, sometimes with his open hand (bitch slap originating from karate) extended outward from his nose.

Sound – Medical device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play. Also called “urethral sounds.”
Spanking – To slap on the buttocks with the open hand, or a short flat object such as a paddle or a hairbrush. Used as both punishment and/or in role-play context in BDSM scenes.
Spanking Bench – BDSM furniture, a variation on the saw horse, onto which a submissive is attached (by cuffs, rope, etc.) for the Dominant to spank and play with.
Speculum – Medical device intended for opening and examining the rectum or vagina; used mostly in “doctor/medical scene” play.
Spencer Paddle – Type of wooden paddle with holes drilled though it.
Spreader Bar – A long metal rod that holds the submissive legs, thighs or even wrists wide apart.
Stigmatophilia – Sexual attraction to body modifications or tattoos
Stocks – A piece of bondage furniture patterned after the Puritan model. The head and hands go through holes while the submissive is standing.
Straitjacket, Straightjacket – Confining device used mostly in psychiatric wards to restrain the insane. It is intended to prevent the movement of the arms and is usually impossible to remove without assistance.
Strangling – see Breath Control.
Strapon – A belt or harness that has a dildo attached. IT allows the wearer the ability to fuck another either in the vagina or anus.
Strapping – Another term for a “beating”.
Sub – see Submissive.
Subby – see Submissive.
Subbie – see Submissive.
Submission – The act of submitting to the will and desire of another, usually within negotiated limits.
Submissive – An individual who consents to give up power to a Dominant. This can be for any duration – for an hour or a lifetime.
Subspace – A state of mind and body – often like a trance – caused by endorphins emitted during a BDSM scene.
Surface Burn – A temporary brand, usually produced with copper wire heated less hot than steel used in making a permanent brand.
Surface Piercing – Temporary piercing through the skin’s surface.
Suspension – suspending a submissive with ropes, webbing or chain so that no part of the body touches the floor. Not recommended for beginners.
Switch – A person who can both Dom and sub depending on the situation and his partner. Many switches have switches as partners.


24/7 – A 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. At all times.
TENS Unit – Acronym for Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation unit. Used for sexual stimulation is electrical play scenes. See also Violet Wand.
TPE – Total Power Exchange; term reserved for established 24/7 Master/slave relationships.
TT – Tit torture.
Temporary Piercing – Piercing the body temporarily. All piercings are removed at the end of the session. Same as play piercing.
Thermolysis – A form of electrical hair removal.
Thong Whip – A whip made of thing strands of either leather or rubber. When swing lightly it will not cause much pain, when swung hard it can cause considerable pain.
Timophilia – Sexual arousal from wealth, yet another thing most females have even if the wont admit to it.
Top – A Dominant, the person who is in charge or has control.
Topping from the bottom – This is where a submissive dictates the action in a scene, something that is highly frowned upon. Can also be used in real time context. When a submissive becomes too demanding.
Torture – Term meaning to cause pain.
Toy, BDSM – Any piece of equipment used in a BDSM scene.
Tragus – Piercing through the ridge on the face side of the ear hole.
Transgender – Not quite male, not quite female.
Transgenderism – incorporating manners, behaviors, appearance, etc of the opposite sex while still maintaining some of the above of your biological sex.
Tweezer Nipple Clamps – A style of nipple clamp that is like a pair of tweezers with a ring around the outside. As you push the ring toward the pincher ends, it causes the clamp to tighten or bite harder.


Urethral Play – Play involving the urethra, the tube that runs between the bladder and the outside of the body. Not for beginners.
Urethral Sound – Medical device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play.
Urolagnia – Sexual excitement from urine or the act of urination


Vacuum Pumping – Using the suction of a vacuum to increase the size of body parts.
Vampirism – Sexual arousal caused by drinking blood
Vanilla – People not in the BDSM or Fetish lifestyle. Most people, whether admitted or not have some sort of fetish.
Violet Wand – An electric device usually in form of a glass cylinder, which uses the effect of high frequency electric charges to apply intense stimulation.
Virtual life or Virtual Time – v/l or v/t – often used to describe “online life” as opposed to r/l (real life).


WS – see Water Sports.

Waterboarding - an interrogation technique simulating the experience of drowning, in which a person is strapped head downwards on a sloping board or bench with the mouth and nose covered, while large quantities of water are poured over the face.

Water Sports – The sexual enjoyment of urine play. Also called Golden Showers (or GS).
Wattenburg Wheel – A medical pinwheel that is commonly used in BDSM play to stimulate or cause a feeling sensation.
Wax Play – Play in which the Dominant brings hot wax on the submissive’s skin.
Web – A bondage device, popular in many dungeons, created with ropes that are spun like a spider’s web.
Weights – Used to stretch body parts such as nipples and labia; usually attached to clamps or piercings.
Whip – Usually made of leather with a medium size handle and long braided leather strings.
Whipping Post – In olden times, a post to which offenders were fastened for whippings. Reproductions are sometimes used in BDSM dungeons.

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